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Brian_05_SEL

Great ad for a Volvo longroof

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Haha that's actually really funny.

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Here is a copy of the original ad’s text:

 

1996 Volvo 850R 

fuel: gas 
title status: clean 
transmission: automatic 

For sale is my 96 Volvo 850R turbo station wagon. Don't be fooled by its super aerodynamic square shape, this wagon hauls ass. It's the kinda vehicle that says "I'm responsible but after I spank your mustang GT I'm coming for your girlfriend". This vehicle literally has a powerband that comes on like a 125 2-stroke, one second of turbo lag then you're stuck to the seat like glue. It really has a lot of personality and makes hilarious spooling and wooshing turbo sounds.

I love to drive this car and I'm going to be sad to see it go however I'm in a relationship now and I can't have women just throwing themselves at me when I drive this thing anymore. This vehicle has a lot of storage space, my 250 Ktm fits in back with the bars off, I've actually gone to a race like that and gotten some good laughs. Go on and ask your sister about how roomy the back is, she'll tell ya. I brought this vehicle to the drag strip just to see how fast it was and it's a consistent 14.8 at 98 which is pretty quick on the street. She won't run with the LS or the coyote but everything else on the road is your b*tch.

The odometer stopped working at 157,000 so your guess is as good as mine on mileage, but don't be worried this wagon is strong like a bull on viagra. So if you're tired of everything on the street smoking your civic step into the world of Swedish boost machines and go get them balls back. This vehicle will change your life, I have gray hair and my girlfriend is super hot, 100% from the Volvo because I know my personality is shit. This is the fastest 2000$ vehicle for sale in America, if you don't believe me come grab a lane on river rd and bring your pile.

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